Texting Icks: 25 Texts That Give People the Ick

6 min read · Say Less

Texting icks are small habits in how someone texts that suddenly make you less attracted to them, like "k." replies, triple texts, or calling you "m'lady." They aren't dealbreakers on paper, but they kill the vibe fast. Below are 25 real texting icks with examples, and how to avoid each one.

Worried your own texts are giving someone the ick? Say Less reads a screenshot of your chat and scores the vibe, effort and momentum, so you can see if it's you. Read my chat

What "the ick" means

"The ick" is that sudden cringe feeling when someone you liked does something that instantly turns you off. It's not logic. It's a gut "ew, no."

The term blew up on TikTok and Love Island (UK), and it's now normal slang in the US and Canada too. In text messaging, the ick usually comes from tone, effort or weird energy, not from one typo.

Quick meaning check:

• The ick: a turn-off, often small and a bit irrational.
• A red flag: a sign of something actually concerning.
• Getting the ick over text: when their messages, not their face, flip the switch.

25 texting icks (with example messages)

Low-effort icks

1. The "k." — You send a paragraph, they send "k." with a period. Feels cold.
2. "lol" to everything — "I got the job!" … "lol nice." Zero enthusiasm.
3. "wyd" as a whole personality — Every chat starts with "wyd" and goes nowhere.
4. Only answering, never asking — "Good." Never "wbu?" You're doing a solo interview.
5. The 9-hour reply to "haha" — Slow is fine. Slow and empty is the ick.

Too-much icks

6. Double texting ick — "hey" … "hellooo?" … "??" within 20 minutes. One follow-up is fine; a string of them feels needy.
7. Paragraphs on day two — Life story before you've even met.
8. "Good morning beautiful" from someone you've spoken to once. Too fast.
9. Instant replies at 3am, every time. Feels like they're waiting by the phone.
10. Future-planning on the first chat — "Our kids would be so cute." Relax.

Cringe-energy icks

11. "m'lady" / "hey there cutie ;)" — Try-hard.
12. Winky face after everything ;) ;) ;)
13. Spelling "you" as "u" and "your" as "ur" when it's "you're." Some people don't care. Some really do.
14. "Hehe" + a creepy emoji combo.
15. Sending a voice note of you breathing before talking.

Ego icks

16. Humble-brag texts — "Ugh, so tired from the gym and my side hustle."
17. Negging — "You're pretty for someone who…" Big no.
18. Talking about their ex in text three.
19. Correcting your grammar mid-flirt.
20. Only replying when they want something — a ride, notes from class, a favor.

Chaos icks

21. Screenshotting your chat to the group chat (and you find out).
22. Leaving you on read, then posting a story.
23. "Are you mad at me?" every time you're slow.
24. Sending the same pickup line they clearly sent to five people.
25. "We should hang out sometime" with zero follow-up, forever.

Some of these icks examples are funny, some are real warning signs. Which brings us to the next part.

Icks by platform: iMessage, Snap, Hinge

Each app has its own ick culture:

How to not give someone the ick over text

Here's how to stop giving the ick without turning into a robot:

1. Match their length. If they send two lines, send about two lines. Not ten, not one word.
2. Ask one real question per few messages. Keeps it a conversation, not an interview.
3. One follow-up max. If they don't answer, wait. Don't triple text.
4. Save the intense stuff for in person. Big compliments, feelings, future talk.
5. Drop the pickup-line energy. Say something specific to them: "Wait, you've been to Montreal? Rate the bagels."
6. Plan like an adult. "Free Thursday? Coffee near campus?" beats "we should link sometime."

How to not give girls the ick (and guys too)

The biggest texting icks for guys and girls overlap: low effort, too much too soon, and ego. If you're a guy texting a girl, the fastest fix is simple. Be specific, be a little funny, and don't make her do all the work.

Here's the hard part: you can't see your own texts the way they do. Say Less reads your chat and gives a plain take on the vibe and effort on both sides, plus one text move a day like "Match their length" or "Kill the hey". Read my chat

Can you come back from the ick?

Sometimes. It depends on how big it was and how much good stuff came before it.

• Small ick, strong chat: usually recoverable. Just don't repeat it.
• Ick in the first week: harder. There's less goodwill to balance it out.
• The same ick three times: that's their vibe now.

If you think you gave someone the ick, don't write an apology essay. Just reset the energy with a normal, confident text, like a funny callback to something they said earlier. If you want lines for that, our guide to replying when someone says you're so funny shows how to keep a bit going.

Ick or real red flag?

Not every texting ick matters. "He uses too many exclamation points" is a preference. Some things deserve more than an "ew":

• Pressuring you to send photos.
• Getting angry when you don't reply fast.
• Guilt-tripping, name-calling, constant "who are you with?"
• Hot and cold on purpose to keep you guessing.

Those aren't icks. They're red flags. Take them seriously, and it's fine to leave the chat.

Find out what your texts are really giving

Drop a screenshot of a recent chat into Say Less and in about a minute you'll get their Interest Level out of 100, your effort and vibe scores, a plain read of what's going on, and three replies (smooth, funny or bold) that won't give anyone the ick. The screenshot is read once and not stored.

Read my chat

FAQ

What does ick mean in text?

In texting, "the ick" means something about how someone messages suddenly turned you off, like one-word replies or cheesy lines. If someone texts "that's an ick," they mean it's cringe or unattractive to them. It's usually playful, but sometimes they mean it.

Is double texting an ick?

One follow-up after a day or so is normal and usually fine. The double texting ick kicks in when it's several messages in a row, fast, especially with "??" or guilt. Space it out and keep it light.

How do I stop giving the ick over text?

Match their message length, ask real questions, skip pickup lines and don't chase with multiple texts. Make plans clearly instead of saying "sometime." Most icks come from too little effort or too much, so aim for the middle.

What are the biggest texting icks on Reddit?

Threads on texting icks on Reddit keep coming back to the same few: "k." replies, never asking questions back, dry "lol" responses, and people who only text late at night. Overly cheesy lines and "m'lady" energy come up a lot too.

Can you get over the ick with someone?

Sometimes, if it was small and the rest of the connection is strong. It's harder early on when there's not much built up yet. If the same ick keeps happening, it's usually not going away.